IT CAME FROM THE BOTTOM SHELF!

“Would you mind telling me, what’s television? Burlesque with an antenna. That’s television!”

— Jerry Biffle (Phil Silvers) in Top Banana (1954)

If you’ve seen Top Banana on television or home video, you haven’t seen Top Banana. The version available on DVD, which also receives periodic TCM airings, runs a scant 84-minutes, but the original theatrical version ran 100-minutes long. From the 30-minute mark forward, the television version is plagued by awkward jump cuts, where hunks of precious footage are missing. As a result, the film has a less-than-stellar reputation. However, having had the rare opportunity to view a 16mm Kodachrome print of the complete 100-minute version at the Columbus Moving Picture Show, I can say that the uncut version of Top Banana is a surprisingly satisfying record of mid-century musical theater, burlesque humor, and most importantly, the comedic genius of Phil Silvers. It is a disgrace that MGM (the current rights holder) has not restored the theatrical cut or allowed someone else to privately fund a restoration. However, before I get on my soap box, let’s talk about the film itself.

Phil Silvers was not a household name in the early 1950s. Movie audiences might have vaguely recognized him as a character actor, who played the “sidekick” or “best friend” roles in a handful of comedies and musicals, but those roles gave him little opportunity to showcase the rapid-fire comedic chutzpah for which he would later become famous. However, those who had encountered Silvers’ work on stage, knew him to be a comedian of the first rank, with unmatched comic timing and the ability to quickly ad-lib himself out of any unexpected situation.*

Silvers used his amazing comic skills to rise from the vaudeville stage, to burlesque “top banana,” to Broadway lead (after a side trip in the USO). He scored a sensation in the Broadway musical High Button Shoes, playing a con man (a role he would fall back on throughout the rest of his career). Then in 1951, he was awarded his first Tony for his performance as Jerry Biffle, a brash, Milton Berle-like TV comedian in the musical Top Banana. The show ran for two years on Broadway (350 performances), after which the cast took the show on a year-long, multi-city road tour, ending at the Biltmore Theatre in downtown Los Angeles. However, that was not to be the end of show.

The producers made a deal with United Artists to film Top Banana exactly as it had been performed on the stage. The idea was that the movie would serve as a test run for a potential series of inexpensively filmed Broadway plays. The original cast, sets, and costumes were hauled to a Hollywood soundstage, made up to look like the interior of a theater, and the production was quickly filmed and recorded over five days. To give audiences the feel of a front row seat at a Broadway show, the production was photographed in color widescreen 3-D. Unfortunately, by the time the movie was ready for release, the 3-D fad had nearly run its course. Consequently, the movie was only released in a flat 2-D version. Worse yet, without the 3-D gimmick or bankable stars, the movie laid an egg at the box office, ending any idea of a series of Broadway movies.

While the 3-D novelty was eliminated, and six or seven of the songs were cut for time, the lion’s share of the comedy was preserved in the 100-minute movie version. Phil Silvers plays TV comedian Jerry Biffle, who headlines the Blendo Soap variety show and micromanages every aspect of the program. Biffle learned in burlesque that if you want to be the reigning star (a.k.a. “Top Banana”), you have to keep plugging away to keep your name in front of the public. As a result, when he’s not working on the show itself, he’s constantly working on “ad-libs” for personal appearances and gossip columns. Actually, Biffle largely swipes his ad-libs from his head writer (Jack Albertson), his barber (Silvers’ burlesque mentor Herbie Faye), and his deli delivery guy (Joey Faye, no relation to Herbie). Biffle’s latest publicity stunt involves helping his show’s singer (Danny Scholl) elope. However, what Biffle doesn’t know is that his singer is eloping with Sally Peters (Judy Lynn), the model who Biffle himself is currently dating.

The plot matters little in Top Banana. Everything is an excuse for burlesque schtick, and the film is populated with funny people from top to bottom. Jack Albertson, Herbie Faye, and Joey Faye had all previously shared the burlesque stage with Silvers, so the four comics effortlessly mine solid laughs from cornball jokes and moth-eaten bits of hokum. It’s a master class in timing and comedic give-and-take. The show also includes comic support from a pre-Dick Van Dyke Show Rose Marie, from the silent physical comedian Johnny Trama (in a Buster Keaton-like porkpie hat), and through Johnny Mercer’s witty song lyrics. Even the dancing girls in the big burlesque production number are allowed to join in the physical comedy.

It must be admitted that Top Banana is a weird, ramshackle motion picture, even at it’s full 100-minute running time. The movie was cheaply produced (perhaps the cheapest in United Artist’s history), and it looks it. The photography is mostly static, and the quality of the sound varies depending on where the actors are standing on “stage.” While there is an attempt to simulate a live performance by inserting a shots of a theater audience, the comedy plays against dead silence. The missing laughter is a little unsettling when watching the movie alone. The musical numbers can also be a bit jarring, as they were pre-recorded, which takes away from the live feel the producers were trying to convey.

Despite the claims of presenting Top Banana exactly as produced on Broadway, a lot of the show, which ran well over two-hours on stage, was not included in the movie version (even at the full 100 minutes). Anything that was not a showcase for Phil Silvers or part of the “young lovers” B-plot was excised, including most of Rose Marie’s role, several of Johnny Mercer’s songs, and a singing dog (who only appears at the curtain call). Still, the 100-minute movie preserves most of the hilarious, dynamic (some would say “exhausting”) performance by Phil Silvers, which is absolutely glorious.

Now comes the tragedy. The laboratory that processed the dual negatives necessary for 3-D went out of business the year after Top Banana was released. It is thought that the original negatives were destroyed at that time. That only left a couple of surviving 35mm release prints (and a few 16mm dupes). Since all of the release prints were made from the “right eye” negative, reconstructing a 3-D version of Top Banana is impossible. What’s more, United Artists only holds an incomplete 35mm release print, running 84 minutes, in their archive. This is what has been used for the home video releases. Why United Artists’ 35mm print is incomplete is unknown, as Top Banana was never released to theaters in a shortened version. What we do know is that the complete 100-minute version could be reconstructed and restored, because a complete 35mm print does exist in the UCLA Film and Television Archive (in addition to complete 16mm copies, like the one I viewed). The only thing stopping a 2-D restoration of the 100-minute version is the will to do so.

So what’s missing from the 84-minute print? Unfortunately, the answer to that question is “Only the best stuff in the film!”

Comparing the 16mm presentation at the Columbus Moving Picture Show to the DVD, here are the differences that I recall:

1. After Jerry Biffle and his entourage meet Sally Peters in the department store, they go up to the Book Department for Biffle’s book signing. The first two-thirds of the Book Department scene are missing. Jerry greets fans and basks in their adulation, until the crowd is distracted by someone more interesting. Amongst Biffle’s fans is diminutive contortionist Johnny Trama, whose “Little Man” character shows up periodically in the movie to cause physical comedy chaos. Biffle initially mistakes Trama for a child, until he spots the Little Man’s mustache. After the fans have left, Biffle’s sponsor (Bradford Hatton) shows up at the public appearance. This leads into an argument regarding potential changes the sponsor would like to see to the Blendo show. The 84-minute version picks up again, mid-argument.
2. After hiring Sally Peters (Judy Lynn) as a new commercial announcer for the show, there is a missing scene where Biffle coaches Sally on how to deliver the ad copy. This is the longest of the missing scenes. It’s also the scene that is most missed in the truncated version, as it is the absolute comic highlight of the movie. Phil Silvers’ hectoring schtick in this scene is the variation on his famous “Singing Lesson” sketch that he worked up with Frank Sinatra during a USO tour. The gist of the bit is that as soon as Sally tries to utter a single syllable, Silvers interrupts, sometimes physically grabbing her face to coach her. Sally is unable to get anywhere with the ad copy, because she can’t get a word in edgewise. However, this routine in Top Banana far surpasses the comedic brilliance of the “Singing Lesson” sketch, due to a mistake made by Silvers early in the run of the Broadway show. In his efforts to constantly interrupt Sally, Silvers accidentally turned to one of the male actors, and said, “Listen, honey…” To cover, Silvers ad-libbed that he had made a Freudian slip, and then he used his knowledge of psychotherapy (from his own therapy sessions) to launch into a monologue about a great debate between Sigmund Freud and Baruch Spinoza. The monologue was ridiculous and nonsensical (especially when you consider that Spinoza and Freud were born 200 years apart). With fearless abandon (and amazing lung power) Silvers kept up the pontification long beyond the point one would think that the routine could sustain it’s humor. The ad-libbed diatribe brought down the house, and from that point on, it was a regular part of the show. This amazing bit is complete in the 100-minute version, but it is missing entirely from the shorter cut.
3. After Silvers completes the “Freud/Spinoza” routine, the missing footage continues. It is suggested that the Blendo Soap program needs a new slogan. Jack Albertson’s “Slogan Song” is completely missing. This leads into a second song, based on the program’s new slogan, “Meet Miss Blendo.” The 84-minute version picks up towards the end of the second song. Originally, “Meet Miss Blendo” was the big closer of Act I, but the impact is lost when almost the entirety of the scene is missing.
4. When Biffle and his masseur take a ladder to help his singer elope, they encounter Joe Trama’s “Little Man.” The three men get physically entangled with each other. The middle section of this physical comedy routine is missing.
5. Finally, there are cuts during the last, big production number, where Biffle remembers his “good old days” in burlesque. The latter half of a dance by featured beauty Bubbles (Gloria Smith) is cut, as is the first half of the comedy magic act. Ms. Smith’s dance was one of my favorite moments in the longer cut, because it was surprisingly funny. Ms. Smith really sells the physical comedy of trying to appear sexy while accidentally slipping on a wet spot on the floor and then nearly running into the stage curtain. The slip is still present in the 84-minute cut, but the near collision with the curtain is missing.

The cuts in the 84-minute version of Top Banana appear seemingly at random, ruining the narrative flow of the film and interrupting musical numbers and comic set pieces. Apart from the first half hour, which appears more-or-less intact, the rest of the film is largely an incoherent mess. Of course, few films could maintain coherence after randomly losing 16% of their footage. Since I was familiar the 84-minute version, I was shocked at just how smooth, coherent, and hilarious the 100-minute version plays out. The longer cut presents Phil Silvers giving an astoundingly vigorous performance at the peak of his comedic powers. The hacked up 84-minute version greatly diminishes the impact of that same performance. Hopefully, MGM will come to their senses and allow others to crowdfund a restoration if they are not willing to do it themselves. This boils down to more than dollars and cents. This is comedy history we’re talking about!

* For a good example of Phil Silver’s ad-libbing abilities, I recommend watching “The Court Martial,” the 25th episode of The Phil Silvers Show. Sgt. Bilko (Silvers) has to serve as a lawyer to a chimpanzee, and when the chimp goes off-script, Silvers follows right along with him.

USA/C-100m./Dir: Alfred E. Green/Wr: Gene Towne (based on the musical by Hy Kraft & Johnny Mercer)/Cast: Phil Silvers, Rose Marie, Jack Albertson, Danny Scholl, Judy Lynn, Bradford Hatton, Herbie Faye, Joey Faye, Johnny Trama

For Fans of: How much you like Top Banana is completely dependent on how much you like Phil Silvers. If you’re a fan of The Phil Silvers Show (a.k.a. Sgt. Bilko), you’re sure to appreciate the film (especially in the full 100-minute version).

Video: MGM Home Video released the incomplete 84-minute cut of Top Banana as a DVD-R in their MGM Limited Edition Collection. Not only is it a cheaply-produced, burned disc, rather than a professionally pressed disc; the DVD-R is a “bare bones” release without any extras. With all of the stories behind the Broadway show, the intended use of 3-D, the loss of the original negatives, and the raggedy condition of the 84-minute version, the disc could have really benefited from an audio commentary or featurette to put the film in context.

The color and sound look fine overall, considering how cheaply the movie was filmed in the first place. However, I suspect that the aspect ratio is incorrect. I know that the film was intended to be shot in widescreen, but the DVD-R presents the movie in the squarish “full frame” format. I can’t say for sure that this framing is wrong, as I don’t know what aspect ratio was used when the movie finally hit theaters. I also don’t remember if the framing was different when I viewed the 16mm print of the 100-minute version. I was too focused on the comedy and the “new” footage I was seeing to pay attention to the aspect ratio.

Streaming: At the time of this review, Top Banana (1954) wasn’t streaming on any of the major subscription services. It also was unavailable for purchase digitally on iTunes, Amazon, Vudu, and other retailers.

More to Explore: Happily, there are a lot of other home video releases for Phil Silvers fans. First and foremost is the Sgt. Bilko – The Complete Phil Silvers Show DVD box set from Shout! Factory, which collects all four seasons of the funniest sitcom of television’s golden age. Silvers also lends scene-stealing support in the movies It’s A Mad Mad, Mad, Mad World (1963) and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum (1966), which can both be purchased on Blu-ray.

Trivia: While the 3-D negatives no longer exist, Bob Furmanek of the 3-D Film Archive discovered that much of the footage in the trailer was taken from the left eye print. He was able to combine this with the “right eye” footage in the release print to create a 3-D version of the trailer. That trailer is attached above.

For More Info: For information on the life of Phil Silvers, you can’t do better than This Laugh is on Me by Phil Silvers with Robert Saffron. I also recommend Bilko: Behind the Lines With Phil Silvers by Mickey Freeman and Sholom Rubinstein and King of the Half Hour: Nat Hiken and the Golden Age of TV Comedy by David Everitt.